Responsibilities of Fathers
Fathers provide
Well, the scriptures tell us that one of the responsibilities as fathers is to provide material necessities. Paul writes in 1Timothy 5:8, "If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever."
Fathers are to provide for them, to make sure that their children have a home, and food to eat, and clothing to wear. But scripture always teaches that there must be a balance. Sometimes we are so focused on providing things, that we present an unbalanced picture to our children.
God has always provided for His children, but He never provided too much. When the children of Israel were in the wilderness, God provided them manna for just one day at a time. Every morning they would have to go out and collect the manna again. Only on the 6th day did He give them extra so that they wouldn’t have to work on the Sabbath. And God didn’t put it in their baskets for them. They had to go out and gather it for themselves. They had to work for it.
Make sure that our children have all they need, but also make sure they appreciate those things, and are willing to go out and work for them when their turn comes
They are also to provide spiritual leadership.
Paul writes, "Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord" [Ephesians 6:4. This is another of our responsibilities - to provide discipline and instruction and to make sure that they are spiritual leaders in their homes. If they’re not spiritual leaders in their homes, then they are neglecting a very important responsibility God has given to them.
Fathers protect
Instinctively, almost all of us have those feelings of wanting to hold our families close and to make sure that nothing ever harms them.
Fathers have to make sure they are meeting that very basic need for their children so that they’ll never be searching for a father-figure someplace else.
Protect them! Make sure that they are being taught the right things and their minds are being filled with wholesome truths. Protect them from all the evil and false doctrines that are out there.
Loving Fathers
John Dresser wrote a book titled, "If I Could Do It All Again." In it he shares 8 things that he would do differently if he could go through his years of being a father all over again. Here is what Dresser wrote:
1. "First of all, if I could do it all over again, I would love my wife more, because by loving my children’s mother more, I would create an environment of security in our home. Our love would be something they could see - something they would never have to worry about."
2. "Second, I would laugh more. I would relax and enjoy my children and laugh at their antics. I would spend more time with them and enjoy being a father."
3. "Third, I would present a more realistic model for them to follow. I would be honest with them about myself. I would let them know that I had problems in school, too, that I stumbled, & made mistakes, and failed. I would let them know that I understand, and that they can come to me when they fail, because I have been there as well."
4. "Fourth, I would listen to what they say. I would listen to their pains and problems and worries and concerns. I would listen when they wanted to talk to me, because now I realize that if I listen to them when they are small, and to their little problems, then when they are big, and have big problems, they will still come and talk with me."
5. "Fifth, I would stop praying so much for my family, and start praying more for myself, because a father’s prayers so often sound something like this, `God, make my son and daughter good people. Help them to succeed in school. Help them to find the right person to marry. Take care of them and protect them.’ We’re always praying for them, it seems." "But I would start praying more for myself, that I might be the right kind of father, realizing that when I become the right kind of father, my children will probably be the right kind of children."
6. "Sixth, I would pay more attention to little things. I would begin to appreciate the touch of love and the word of encouragement. So many times we fathers are quick to criticize their failures, and so slow to praise and encourage them when they do something right."
7. "Seventh, I would create an environment of belonging. I would want my children to know that they belong, and that they are important family members, because I realize that there are going to be people saying to them, `Join this and join that.’ But if they have a solid identity in the home and in the family they will not easily be led astray."
8. "Last, but certainly not least, I would make God an intimate friend of my family. I would use His name freely. I would communicate to them that He is involved in all our family decisions. I would want them to see me pray and read God’s Word & search for His direction and leadership."
If I had my life to live over again, I think I would try very seriously to improve in those eight areas, too.
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